我向上帝求一首歌，他说：为什么？ I asked God for a song and He asked me: Why?
那是在1993年10月16日，我在新加坡东岭圣经学院的第一年。。。
That was in Oct 16th, 1993, my first year at Tung Ling Bible College, Singapore…
先让你们看看我“神学生”的样子，怎样？很阳光吧？哈哈。。。
Show you first my “Bible-school-student-look”, how? Very sunny huh? Haha…
事情的经过是这样的，我一直很想写一首歌让人听了很感动与超喜欢的，我想要有一首“代表作”。。。
所以我那天就很认真来到上帝面前，宣告禁食早餐和午餐。你要了解当时的我，禁一餐都会几乎要死，但为了要写一首很有恩膏的歌，我觉得那是很值得的。。。你赞成吗？
那天没课，我还乖乖留在神学院，没跟同学出去。。。自己一个人躲在一个小课室里，禁食祷告、赞美敬拜好几个小时，真的很摆上、很付出；我觉得自己还蛮伟大、爱主的。。。
我为我的谦卑感到骄傲。。。
The situation was such, I had always wanted to write a song that would really touch people or people would just love it upon listening, that is my own hit or “signature” song…
So I was very serious in coming to the Lord that day, I declared a fast on breakfast and lunch. You must understand, at that time it would almost kill me to fast even one meal, but for the sake of writing a very anointed song, I thought it was really worth it… don’t you agree?
There was no class that day, I stayed back in school like a good boy, not going out with friends… I hid myself in a small classroom, fasting and praying, praising and worshipping for hours, very sacrificial and committed; I felt I was quite great and really loved the Lord…
I felt proud of my humility…
好，给你看我那谦卑的“浩恋”(骄傲)脸。。。这也是在神学院拍的。。。
Ok, show you my humble proud face… this was also taken in the Bible school…
正当我觉得我的赞美敬拜和祷告都已经很够时，我跟上帝说：看吧，我已经很付出和认真的来亲近你了，所以来吧，给我一首很有恩膏的歌吧。。。
我就很努力的尝试去写，可怎么写来写去都没灵感。。。我有点不耐烦了，再说：怎么搞的，我都牺牲了那么多来亲近你，你连一首歌都不给我吗？
这时只听到上帝轻轻的在我心中说一句话，很温柔但如刀一样刺入我的心，他说：林义忠，你为什么亲近我？
只那么一句，我就懂他的意思了。。。我知道他很难过，因我亲近他只是为了自己得着好处，并不是自己想要亲近他，我顿时觉得好惭愧。。。
When I thought my praise and worship and prayers were very sufficient, I told God: Look, I am very serious and have sacrificed much to draw near to You, so come, give me a very anointed song…
Then I tried very hard to write, but no matter how I did not have any inspiration… so I was getting impatient and said again: What’s wrong? I have already sacrificed so much to draw near to You, can’t You even give me a song?
At that point, I just heard the Lord softly speak to my heart, very gentle but piercing into my heart like a knife, He said: GT, why do you draw near to me?
Just that one sentence, and I knew what He meant… I knew He felt sad because I came near to Him just for my own benefit, and not really because I myself longed to be near Him. I immediately felt very ashamed of myself…
过后，我不敢再求什么，我只是悔改，然后用一首歌把我的悔改表达出来，以下这首“亲近你的时候”，就是在那一刻写的。。。
After that, I dared to ask no more, I just repented and used a song to express my repentance, and the song “When I draw near to You” below, was written at that moment…
亲近你的时候 / When I draw near to You
当我亲近你的时候，抱着什么样的心情
哦主啊，唯有你看得清
当我亲近你的时候，我心里有什么动机
主啊，求你鉴察我的心
让我亲近你只单单因为我爱你
只因为喜欢和你在一起
让我亲近你只单单因为我爱你
只因为喜欢和你在一起
When I draw near to You, what is actually my feeling
O Lord, only You can see clearly
When I draw near to You, what is the motive inside
O Lord, do search and examine my heart
Let me draw near to You just because I love You
Just because I long to be with You
Let me draw near to You just because I love You
Just because I long to be with You