第三十八天：11月9日(三)

谁不想发财？谁不想做有钱人？
只要不要得罪神，不用犯罪手段得着的钱财，发财或有钱并没什么不可以，甚至会有许多好处，也是神许可！
但得着财富，随之而来的可能是很多压力，或未必会享受或快乐，尤其是靠自己力量得来的财富。唯有“耶和华所赐的福，使人富足，并不加上忧虑。”（箴言10:22)

但如何才能得着这耶和华所赐的福呢？当然圣经里有好一些明显原则，但今天跟你们分享哥林多后书9章：

“9:6 少 种 的 少 收 ， 多 种 的 多 收 。 这 话 是 真 的 。
9:7 各 人 要 随 本 心 所 酌 定 的 。 不 要 作 难 ， 不 要 勉 强 ， 因 为 捐 得 乐 意 的 人 ， 是 神 所 喜 爱 的 。
9:8 神 能 将 各 样 的 恩 惠 ， 多 多 的 加 给 你 们 。 使 你 们 凡 事 常 常 充 足 ， 能 行 各 样 的 善 事 。
9:9 如 经 上 所 记 ， 他 施 舍 钱 财 ， 周 济 贫 穷 。 他 的 仁 义 存 到 永 远 。
9:10 那 赐 种 给 撒 种 的 ， 赐 粮 给 人 吃 的 ， 必 多 多 加 给 你 们 种 地 的 种 子 ， 又 增 添 你 们 仁 义 的 果 子 。
9:11 叫 你 们 凡 事 富 足 ， 可 以 多 多 施 舍 ， 就 藉 着 我 们 使 感 谢 归 于 神 。”

1）我相信在神眼中，多种或少种不在于你给的数目的大小，乃在于相比之下你保留给自己的有多少，或看你给出去的与你的收入或所拥有的比率。

2）神喜悦祝福和帮助人的心胸，而且是带着喜乐去做，不是勉强，也没有其它动机，甚至没有想到自己蒙福。

3）非常重要的是，你的善行最终带来人把感谢和荣耀归给神！

以上三点乃神要赐福给你，使你凡事富足的原则。

Day 38 : Nov 9th (Wed)

Who does not want to be prosperous? Who does not want to be a rich person?
As long as you do not sin against God or use sinful methods to get your money, there is nothing wrong to be rich, in fact there can be many advantages, and it is something God approves too!
But when you become rich, what comes along might be a lot of stress and pressure, especially wealth gotten through your own strength. But “the blessing of the LORD brings wealth, and he adds no trouble to it.” ( Proverbs 10:22 )

But how can we receive this blessing of the Lord? Of course there are many principles in the Bible, today I will share with you 2 Corinthians 9:

“6 Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.
7 Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.
8 And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
9 As it is written: “They have freely scattered their gifts to the poor; their righteousness endures forever.”
10 Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness.
11 You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.”

1) I believe in God’s eyes, sowing sparingly or generously is not dependent on the figure or amount you give but rather how much you keep for yourself in comparison, or in proportion of your giving with your income or how much you own.

2) God loves a heart that loves to bless and help others, and doing it with joy, not out of compulsion, and without any other motive, not even thinking of getting blessed for oneself.

3) Very importantly, your good deeds will cause people to give thanks and glory to God ultimately!

The three points above are the principles of God’s blessing you and making you rich in every way.

第三十七天：11月8日(二)

该如何形容那种感觉？幼儿时在大年除夕期待初一的到来、年少时第一次要到海边度假的兴奋、与一群好友第一次到一个美丽的国家旅游、在机场等着思念已久的人。。。？
就是那种感觉吧，这几天内心里就有这种澎湃的感觉，现在亦是如此！

我也尝试问主说，我到底在兴奋什么？知道有好事情会发生，却不知是什么事！知道将得着我好喜欢的礼物，却又不知道那礼物是什么！带领中午祷告会的时候，终于有答案。。。

原来这答案只是回答我为什么我不知道自己在兴奋什么，而不是告诉我兴奋的是什么东西！
上帝说我不知道自己在兴奋什么，因为他要做的是一件“新事”，既然是“新”的，当然不存留在我记忆里，因此我不会知道那是什么东西。他也说他要做的是超越我所求所想的，那当然我也不会知道是什么。。。

“看哪！我要做一件新事，如今要发现，你们岂不知道吗？我必在旷野开道路，在沙漠开江河。”
～ 以赛亚书 43:19 ～

“神能照着运行在我们心里的大力，充充足足地成就一切，超过我们所求所想的。”
～ 以弗所书 3:20 ～

哇！这怎不叫人兴奋呢？
下午准备晚上要分享的“kairos”的信息时，心跳又开始加速了，所以我很确定这奇妙的事将要在11月11日我们结束禁食40天的通宵祷告时降临或开始！这心跳的感觉不仅让我联想以弗所3:20的“心里的大力”，我心里跳动的是否就是这“大力”。。。？

Day 37 : Nov 8th (Tue)

How shall I describe this feeling? Like childhood days anticipating the first day of Chinese New Year on New Year’s Eve, during my youth excited about going to the beach for a holiday for the first time, going to a beautiful country for a tour for the first time together with close friends, and waiting for someone you miss dearly at the airport…?
It is that kind of feeling, my heart has been stirring with this sensation past few days, even right now!

I also attempted to ask the Lord, what am I feeling excited about? I know something good is going to happen, but I do not what thing! I know I am going to receive a gift that I am going to love very much but I do not know what that gift is! While leading the noontime prayer session, I finally had the answer…

Actually this answer was only to answer me as to why I do not know what I am excited about, and not really telling me what the thing I am excited about exactly is!
God said I do not know what I am feeling excited about because he is going to do a “new thing”, and since it is “new”, it is of course not in my memory. Therefore I would not know what that thing is. He also said what he is going to do is beyond what I have ever asked or what I can imagine, then of course I would not know what that is…

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”
~ Isaiah 43:19 ~

“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us”
～ Ephesians 3:20 ～

Wow! How can I not be excited if so?

This afternoon while preparing my “kairos” message to share at night, my heart began to beat faster again, so I know for certain this wonderful thing that is going to happen will descend or start during our watch-night prayer on November 11th as we conclude our 40-day fast! This unusual heart-beat caused me to recall the “power at work within us” in Eph 3:20, is it this “power” that is pumping in my heart…?

第三十六天：11月7日(一)

早上参加邵遵澜牧师约翰福音的教导，下午1:30我主持国双的丧礼。

很安慰，看到躺在棺木里的他是“含着微笑睡去”，真的很好看；就连他还没信主的阿姨都说“很美”。。。
国双母亲一直很不舍的说“让我再看他最后一眼，让我再看他最后一眼。。。”，我告诉妈妈说你要记得他的笑容，就记得他的笑容。

那么安详含着笑容睡去，你知道他很平安，知道他一定是去到一个很安详、很美丽的地方；看到的人都会很安慰，妈妈的心情也平复了许多，这是我很安慰的。

在丧礼时我分享我家的见证，说多年前我弟弟未满九岁时就离开这世界，他小小年纪都已懂得信耶稣，只是当时爸妈还没信主。我曾经问过妈妈为什么会在弟弟去世后信主？她说其中一个原因是，她看到他躺在棺木里的脸孔，好像一个天使，含着笑容睡着了。所以，我妈妈就相信弟弟信的耶稣一定是很好、很平安的上帝，一定是带他去很美丽的地方。。。

有一些人误会我昨天的分享，以为我深陷沮丧、灰心、挫折，其实不然，我只是与哀哭的人同哀哭，感受人突然离开的难过和沉重。我对神绝对没有怀疑或动摇，况且我很羡慕国双离开时的属灵生命，和他跟主的关系。他最后的日子也学习我们禁食祷告，甚至晨祷都出席！我记得他最后一次的晨祷的时候，我在台上还看着他祷告，心想他的灵命最近真的是突飞猛进。。。然后他最后的时刻，因病了没办法来教会，还在家里躺在沙发上开电脑，陪妈妈一起看聚会现场直播，从家里跟我们一起赞美敬拜，听道时还会笑，就在那时刻呼吸他的最后一口气。。。没有痛苦、没有挣扎，在神的同在里，有最爱的妈妈在身边，这样子回天家。。。

如果我们都能类似这样子回天家，真是何等蒙福的一件事。。。

提后4:6

“我现在被浇奠，我离世的时候到了。那美好的仗我已经打过了；当跑的路我已经跑尽了；所信的道我已经守住了。”
～ 提后 4:6-7 ～

Day 36 : Nov 7th (Mon)

Attended Rev James Shao’s seminar on the book of John in the morning, I conducted Shuang’s funeral at 1:30pm.

Very comforted seeing him “sleeping with a smile” on his face in the casket, he looked good; even his aunty who is not a Christian yet said he was “beautiful”…
Shuang’s mother repeatedly said “Let me have a last look at him, let me have a last look at him…”, I told the mother to remember his smile, just to remember his smile.

So at peace, sleeping with a smile, you know he was really at rest, and you know he has gone to a very peaceful and beautiful place. Whoever saw his last look would be comforted, the mother has calmed down a lot too, this is very reassuring to me.

During the funeral, I shared my family’s testimony. I told them how many years ago my youngest brother who was not even nine left this world. He already believed in Jesus though still a kid, my parents were not Christians then. I once asked my mother why she would believe in Jesus after my brother passed away. She said one of the reasons was she saw in that tiny casket, the face of an angel sleeping with a smile on his face. Therefore, my mother believed that the Jesus my brother trusted in must be a very good peaceful God, and that Jesus must have brought him to a very beautiful place…

Some people misunderstood my sharing yesterday, thinking that I was very depressed, discouraged and feeling defeated. No, you have mistaken, I was only weeping with those who wept, feeling the sadness and heaviness of the sudden departure of someone. I certainly did not doubt God over this. Furthermore, I feel kind of envious of Shuang’s spiritual life and relationship with God at the time of his departure. He learnt to fast and pray with us during his last days, and even attended the early morning prayer sessions! I remember during his final morning prayer, I was watching him from the pulpit, thinking to myself that this guy’s spiritual life had advanced so much recently… Then in his final moment, as he could not make it to church because of illness, he was still lying on the couch at home, turning on the computer to watch our live broadcast with the mother. They joined in the praise and worship, laughed even when we joked in the midst of the sermon, and it was at that time that he breathed his last… no suffering, no struggling, in the presence of God, with the mother he loved so much beside him, he went back to be with the Lord…

If we could all go back to be with the Lord in similar situation, would not that be such a blessed thing?

“For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”
~ 1 Tim 4:6-7 ~