Tag Archive - 禁食四十天,审美观,美好回忆,40-day fast

Day 16 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

 

第十六天1018(二)

这几天心里很兴奋,神让我看到禁食的原因和效果,而且进而施恩给我能够成就我意想不到的事情!
短短的几天,上帝给我属天智慧和感动去很实际,又长远的帮助到一些真正有需要的人,尤其是忠心在神面前服事但家里又困苦的人。

早上心里充满这份喜悦和感动,准备去上班,在门口穿鞋子时,突然听见一声:牧师,早安!
看上去,原来是我们住宅区的园丁,一位马来同胞,他专门负责清理垃圾啦、修理园子啦,这一类杂工;工作虽辛苦,他却是很友善,常常都会跟我打招呼。
今天他像往常在清理垃圾,刚好碰到我在门口。

他突然指向我停车处一个摆放了一个多月的坏了的汽车电池,他说:这个你还要吗?

我心里马上有点生气,生气把电池放在那边的一位青年人陈彬,迟迟不拿走或丢掉!我已经警告过他,说我不喜欢丑化我的家,所以不要放垃圾在我门口!

陈彬寄住在我家,一个多月前汽车电池坏了,换了新的就把这坏的放在门口。
两个星期前我已跟他说:我警告你,你如果再不处理掉这电池,下一次我不是提醒你,我是会用咆哮大喊的!(因为我觉得放一个烂电池在家门口实在很破坏美感。)

我当然也问他干嘛不要就马上丢掉,他说他要拿回家给他爸爸拿去卖掉什么的,我还说:卖掉?这东西能值多少钱?天啊!
他就赶忙道歉说他会马上处理掉。。。他的“马上”竟然是两个礼拜后电池还在!你说我气不气?

所以,当这马来园丁指向这烂电池的时候,我的无名火已经慢慢升起了。。。
我心里想一定是我被人投诉了,因为我们住宅区很注重美感、秩序、保安等等。
我心里想待会陈彬回家时他就有好看!

可是园丁接下来却说:若不要了,可以给我吗?
我:啊?这是我家那个小孩的,我得问他一下。。。但你要来做什么?
园丁:我可以把它重新充电,然后用来点亮家里某些灯泡。
我:你家里没电源吗?你住在什么地方?

他就告诉我他住在某个村庄,那边的电源供应不理想,时常没电。

我:可是这个是坏了的。
园丁:不久前隔壁家给我一个更烂的,都足以供应我三个月的电源。。。

我听了心里很难过,原来他家境那么贫穷,马上说:你拿去吧!
园丁:但你还没问那小孩,他生气怎么办?
我:我没骂他已经很客气了,他还敢生气?

但我心生发怜悯问说:你要不要一台新的?
他很讶异回答:哇,如果是新的就能照亮整个屋子了!但不用了,这一个已经够好了!
我:真的吗?我不介意帮你。
园丁:真的,真的!不用了。。。谢谢你,牧师!
我:那好吧,下一次你家里或生活有什么需要就告诉我吧,我尽量帮助你。

园丁很感恩和开心的拿着坏了的电池走了。。。
我看着他的背影,心里想:神啊,怎么这几天一直有意和无意中帮到一些很有需要的人?怎么接二连三都有这个机会和智慧?
神说:你去看看以赛亚58章吧。
我顿时明白了。。。以赛亚58章讲的就是什么是真正的禁食和其效果!

“我所拣选的禁食不是要松开凶恶的绳,解下轭上的索,使被欺压的得自由,折断一切的轭吗﹖
不是要把你的饼分给饥饿的人,将飘流的穷人接到你家中,见赤身的给他衣服遮体,顾恤自己的骨肉而不掩藏吗﹖
这样,你的光就必发现如早晨的光,你所得的医治要速速发明。你的公义必在你前面行;耶和华的荣光必作你的后盾。
那时你求告,耶和华必应允;你呼求,他必说:我在这里。你若从你中间除掉重轭和指摘人的指头,并发恶言的事,
你心若向饥饿的人发怜悯,使困苦的人得满足,你的光就必在黑暗中发现;你的幽暗必变如正午。
耶和华也必时常引导你,在干旱之地使你心满意足,骨头强壮。你必像浇灌的园子,又像水流不绝的泉源。”
~ 以赛亚书58:6-11 ~

 

 

Day 16 : Oct 18th (Tue)

Been feeling very excited past few days for God has been showing me the reasons for fasting and the results. At the same time, He grants me grace to accomplish things I did not expect!
Within just a few days, God gave me wisdom from above and prompting to help some truly needy people in a very practical and lasting way, especially those who serve God faithfully and are financially challenged at home.

My heart was filled with this joy and conviction this morning as I was preparing to go to work. While putting on my shoes, I heard “Good morning, Pastor!”
I looked up, it was our gardender, a Malay man. He is in charge of clearing the rubbish, repairing and maintaining the garden etc. His work is rather tough but he is a friendly man, always greets me when he sees me.
Today, as usual he was clearing the rubbish and saw me outside the door.

Suddenly he pointed at an old car battery left outside my door for more than a month already, and asked: Do you still want this?

Immediately my heart was a little angry, I felt angry at Jonas, the young man who left it there and kept delaying to take or throw it away! I had warned him, I said I do not like to uglify my house, so do not leave rubbish outside my door! Jonas is lodging at my place, a month ago his car battery broke down, he changed it and left the old one there outside my door.
Two weeks ago I told him: I’m warning you, if you don’t get rid of this battery, the next time I will not be reminding you, I’ll be screaming and shouting at you! (Because I feel a spoilt battery placed outside my door is really unsightly.)

And of course I asked him as to hy he did not throw it away immediately. He said he wanted to bring it home to give to his dad to sell or something. I even said: To sell? How much can that thing fetch? My goodness!
He apologized very quickly an said he would get rid of it immediately… and his “immediately” turned out to be – after two weeks the battery was still there! Now you know why I was angry!

So when this Malay gardener pointed at this old battery, unknown fire started rising inside…
I thought someone must have complained as my residential area is very concerned about beauty, proper order, security etc.
And I thought in my heart: You are in big trouble, Jonas Tan!

But the gardener continued: If you do not want it anymore, can I have it?
Me: Huh? But this belongs to that boy in my house, I have to ask him… but what do you want it for?
Gardener: I can recharge it and it can light up some bulbs in my house.
Me: Don’t you have electricity supply at home? Where do you live?

Then he told me he lives in a village and the electricity supply is not good and very often fails.
I said: but this is a spoilt battery.
Gardener: The other house gave me an even worse one not long ago and it supplied some three months of power supply to me…

I felt rather sad to think that he is actually so poor, so I said immediately: Just take this!
Gardener: But you haven’t asked the boy, will he be angry?
Me: He wouldn’t dare to, I should be the one scolding him!

My heart was filled with compassion, I said: Do you want a new one?
He was very surprised and replied: Wow! A new one can lit up the whole house! But no thanks, this is sufficient!
Me: You sure? I don’t mind helping you.
Gardener: It’s true, yes, this is good enough… thank you, Pastor!
Me: Oh ok, but in future if you or your family need anything or encounter any difficulty in living, do tell me, I’ll try my best to help.

The gardener was full of gratitude and left happily with that spoilt battery…
Watching him walking away, I thought in my heart: God, how come these few days I seem to be consciously or unconsciously helping quite a few needy people? How come the opportunities and wisdom keep coming to me?
God said: Go read Isaiah 58.
Immediately I understood… Isaiah 58 talks about what a true fast is and the results of such a fast…

“Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?
7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe them,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness[a] will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
10 and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
11 The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.”
~ Isaiah 58: 6-11 ~

Day 15 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

第十五天1017(一)

早上读到一位朋友所写的FB状态,跟我之前所写的很类似:
“那么多要做,那么多要学,却那么少时间。。。唉。。。”

真的,我也有太多东西想要做,很多很多书想要读,很多地方想要去等等。。。
特别是身为一位牧师,看到别的讲员讲道讲到天花乱坠、口沫横飞;那么有知识、有学问、有经验。。。有时候也会感觉很自卑、很压力、很无奈、很无力;有时候也会问上帝说怎么办啊?为什么时间那么少?

感谢神,他的恩典够我们用!其实,神的心意很简单,他最想的就是我们单单纯纯信靠他,心中渴望更亲近与爱他就对了。

你可以做了轰动全世界的事情,你可以读完几个学位,你可以参加千个特会,读完万卷属灵书卷,看完圣经数百遍,对原文了如指掌等等等等。。。但那不表示你真正认识神、爱神,或与他很亲近。。。

所以,总结来说,那么多事情要做,又那么少时间的时候,神要我们懂的就是优先顺序;在这短暂的人生里,我们第一件要看重的就是:认识神、亲近神。

“。。。著书多,没有穷尽;读书多,身体疲倦。这些事都已听见了,总意就是敬畏神,谨守他的诫命,这是人所当尽的本分(注:或作“这是众人的本分”)。因为人所做的事,连一切隐藏的事,无论是善是恶,神都必审问。”
~ 传道书12:12-14 ~

Day 15 : Oct 17th (Mon)

Read a friend’s FB status this morning, it was something very similar to what I wrote once:
“So much to do, so much to learn and yet so little time…….sigh…..”

It is true, I really do have so many things I want to do, so many books I want to read, so many places I want to go too etc…
Especially as a pastor, when I see other preachers speak with such eloquence and fluency, so knowledgeable, well-versed, experienced… sometimes I can feel very inferior, pressured, frustrated, helpless; and sometimes I will ask God what am I going to do? Why is my time so limited?

Thank God, His grace is sufficient for me! In fact, God’ desire is very simple, what He wants the most is for us to trust in Him with a child-like faith, and to long to be closer and to love Him more.

You can do something that stirs the whole world, you can complete so many degrees, you can attend thousands of seminars, read uncountable number of books, read the Bible hundreds of times, and understand the original text inside out etc etc… but that does not mean you truly know God, love Him or are very intimate with Him…

Therefore, in conclusion, with so many things to do and so little time, God wants us to set our priorities right; in this short life of ours, the utmost important is: to know God and to draw close to Him.

“… Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body. Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.”
~ Ecclesiastes 12:12-14 ~

Day 14 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

第十四天1016(日)

上帝真的是很爱我们,我们心里担忧或困惑什么,没说出来他都晓得。只要你灵里与神保持亲近,祈求有敏锐聆听他话语的属灵耳朵,他何时何处都可以突然跟你说话。

今早在浴室刷牙洗脸的时候,脑子想着最近一些要帮助的人,有一些需要解决的棘手问题。。。只是想想一下,不是很认真的在寻求答案,因也在准备去教会。突然间,有个两全其美的主意出现在脑海,让我心中马上充满安慰和喜乐,知道我有答案了!
这经历让我想起诗篇139:2所说:“我坐下,我起来,你都晓得,你从远处知道我的意念”。。。

这也让我越发确定,雅各书1:5里的话是可敬可信的:“你们中间若有缺少智慧的,应当求那厚赐与众人、也不斥责人的 神,主就必赐给他。”

所以让我们都向神求智慧,也求敏锐及聆听的耳吧!

Day 14 : Oct 16th (Sun)

God really loves us a lot, whatever we are concerned or bothered with in our hearts, He knows it even without us saying it out. As long as you remain close in your spirit with God, ask for spiritual ears that are sensitive to listen His voice or words, and He might just speak to you wherever or whenever suddenly.

This morning as I was washing in the bathroom, I was thinking in my mind about some people I want to help recently, with some sticky problems to solve… it was just a passing thought, not as though I was seriously seeking some answers as I was getting ready for church anyway. Then suddenly a win-win solution appeared in my mind, and caused my heart to be filled with comfort and joy immediately, I knew I had the answer!
This answer reminded me of Psalm 139:2, “You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.”…

This also reaffirms in me what James 1:5 says is indeed worthy of reverence and trust: “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.”

So let us all ask wisdom from God, and also listening ears that are sensitive!