那一段恐怖的掉发日子。。。 Those scary hair-losing days…
我曾经在面子书上问过上帝在乎我们的头发吗？
其实那是有原因的，因为我曾渡过一段非常“惊恐”的掉发日子。。。
其实在大学的时候，我还挺多头发的，可是在最后一年，我们朋友当中几人，包括我在内都开始纷纷掉发。。。
可能压力太大还是什么的，当然大家也紧张起来，谁不会啊？都还那么年轻！况且人都是爱美的！
我想有谁说自己不爱美，要不是讲骗话，就是对自己的长相早已放弃了！糟了，有没得罪谁啊？放轻松啦，哈哈。。。
I asked once in my Facebook whether God bothers about our hair?
Actually I had a reason for asking because I once went through some real “scary” hair-losing days…
In fact my hair was very thick while at university, only during the final year some of my friends and I began losing hair…
Perhaps due to pressure or what and of course we started to panic, who wouldn’t? We were still so young, and everyone wants to look good!
I think if anyone says he doesn’t care about his look, he is either lying or has given up on his look long ago! Oh dear, have I offended anyone? Take it easy, haha…
看我大学秀发蓬勃的日子。。。
See my thick and bushy hair during my university days…
早期掉头发时还不会太夸张，而且能“拉长补短”，这里盖、那里遮的，所以就这样勉强过日子。。。
大学回来过后两年到新加坡读神学时，也还勉强能掩饰，也多赐天生卷曲发质的功劳。。。
During the early days, it was still not too obvious, and I could “pull or drag” the longer hair to cover the balding spots, so managed to “survive” then…
While studying at a Bible college in Singapore two years after returning from university, I could still manage to “conceal”, thanks to my naturally curly hair…
神学过后开始牧养，脱发问题也日趋严重。。。我也开始很认真为这件事祷告！
After my Bible school, I started pastoring and my hair loss problem became worse… and I began to pray seriously about that!
人一急时什么也祷告的出来。。。
我告诉上帝说我还没结婚，我不想拍秃头新郎照。。。
我也说干嘛外邦明星如郭富城、刘德华等，都不是服事神的人，头发都那么健康好看（我可以感觉到有一些人正在把这些祷告词抄下来。。。）
我当然也很实际的察看一些治疗头发的资讯、广告等。
那时候（1995年）古晋这小地方哪有什么先进的护发店！
但终于从报章上看到有一家说能治疗头发的店，我就鼓起勇气、厚着脸皮去询问。。。
在那店里我很不舒服，因为跟我解释我头发问题的小姐背后坐着一尊很大的偶像；我感觉很讽刺，堂堂我一个牧师却在这偶像面前谈我的问题！
再加上这治发疗程需要约一千六百令吉，给当时很贫穷的我，那就相等于我所有的积蓄！我感到很不平安，我就跟那小姐说我需要考虑。
回家的路上我跟上帝说，你有看到那小姐背后的偶像吗？难道我的上帝不能帮我吗？我就跟上帝说，既然那疗程的昂贵费用我都愿意付，那我宁愿付给上帝，让上帝来医治我脱发的问题！
所以我就决定把那笔数目奉献了，凭信心相信上帝会让我的头发停止掉落。。。
结果发生什么神迹奇事呢？你们看以下的照片就一目了然了。。。
When someone panics, he can pray all kinds of prayers…
I told God I am not married yet, I don’t want to take balding wedding photos…
I also said why non-Christian film stars like Aaron Kwok, Andy Lau etc who are not serving God can have such nice healthy hair (I can feel some people copying down my prayers now…)
I was of course very practical too in reading up some informations and advertisements on hair loss.
At that time (1995), there was of course no very advanced hair treatment centres in small city Kuching!
But finally I saw a shop that claimed to be able to treat hair loss problem from the newspaper, so I gathered up my courage and thickened my skin to enquire…
I felt very uncomfortable in that shop because right behind the lady who explained my hair problem to me, sat a very big idol! I felt it was such a mockery, here me, a pastor talking about my problem in front of this idol? And also the whole treatment would cost me RM1600, and to the very poor me at that time, it was just about all my savings! I felt very uneasy, so I told the lady I needed to consider…
On my way home, I told God, did you see that idol behind the lady? Can’t my own God help me? And I told God I was willing to pay even such an expensive treatment fee, so I would rather pay that to God and let God heal my hair loss problem! Hence, I decided to give that sum to God, and trusted by faith that God would stop my hair from dropping…
As a result, what miracle and signs and wonders happened? The pictures below speak a thousand words, look…
哇！真的是经典照耶！那是2002年，为婚纱经典开幕时拍摄的！可见脱发问题不但没变好，还变本加厉！
我记得那天我已经很努力要遮掩秃头的部分，都没办法遮掩全部了！那时真的感到好沮丧。。。特别是看了照片过后。。。
再给你们多看一些，我知道你们很享受。。。
Wow! Real classic photo! That was 2002, taken while opening for The Wedding Collection! You can see instead of improving, my hair loss problem was getting much worse!
I remember that day I was trying very hard to cover the bald parts and I was not able to cover all! It was quite depressing really at that time… especially after I saw all the photos!
Show you some more, I know you are enjoying this…
跟店主培智弟兄合影。。。
Photo with the shop owner, Brother Teo…
还有老板娘，明妃。。。
And the lady boss, Ming Fei…
跟另一股东腓立拍的更难看，看腓立当时多年轻！
The one taken with the other partner Philip, was even worse, see how young Philip was then!
偏偏当天摄影师又一直拍这个角度！
And somehow that day the photographer kept taking from this angle!
到台湾布道和旅游，头发也不断脱落。。。
My hair continued to drop even as I went to minister as well as holiday in Taiwan…
这种发型哪能耍帅耍酷？
How could you act stunning and cool with such a hairstyle?
心中隐隐作痛有谁晓得。。。上帝啊，为何没垂听我的祷告？
Who knew the secret pain in my heart… O God, why are you not listening to my prayer?
台湾过后到香港。。。在当时还很稚气的田圣旁边，我更显苍老。。。
After Taiwan, we went to Hong Kong… I looked even more haggard and old beside the then still very boyish Daniel…
那一次，2002年，我也到了泰国。。。不知当时同行的人还记得我当时的模样吗？
It was 2002 then, I went to Thailand as well… I wonder whether those who went with me at that time still remember how I looked then?
我唯一的安慰是遇到比我更秃头的象朋友！
My only comfort was to meet the even balder elephant friend!
很有信心、全所有奉献、服事神、相信神。。。结果头发越秃越严重。。。
虽然难过，但我还是照样事奉，照样跟随主。。。要不然怎样呢？难道没头发就不爱主了吗？
虽然耶稣在路21:18说过：你们连一根头发也必不损坏。。。我看到的是相反的，我只能相信万事都互相效力，虽然我极度不喜欢脱发！
当然我没放弃祈求神迹出现，求我的头发再长。。。其实，几乎一想到就祷告！
不知不觉过了那么多年，今天的我又是怎样的呢？
照正常推论，2002年都那么恐怖了，现在若还有头发，大概每一根都叫得出名字了吧。。。但是！！！
哈利路亚！！！我的神是信实的！！！独行奇事的神！！！
看我上个礼拜大年初一才自拍又没修改过的照片，上帝真的保守了我的头发！！
虽然还不是算很稠密，但回头看2002的样子，我已经超级感恩了！！
Full of faith, gave all I had, serving God, believing in Him… consequently my balding problem grew worse…
Though I felt sad, I continued to serve, continued to follow God… otherwise what? Shall I stop loving God just because I do not have any hair left?
Though Jesus said in Luke 21:18: not a hair of your head will perish… and I saw the complete opposite, I can only believe that all things work for the good, though I totally dislike losing hair!
And of course I never stopped asking for a miracle, for my hair to grow again… in fact I would pray whenever I remember!
In the twinkling of an eye, many years passed by, how do I look today?
By normal assumption, it was already so scary in 2002, and if I still have any hair left on my head now, I should be able to call them one by one by name… BUT!!!!
Hallelujah!!! My God is faithful!!! God of wonders and miracles!!!
Look at the photo I took of myself on the first day of Chinese New Year just last week without any photoshop, God has really preserved my hair!!
Though not very thick as yet, looking back at how it was in 2002, I am certainly all full of gratitude!!
我相信会长回越来越多的，阿们！！
I believe it will grow back more and more, Amen!!
