Tag Archive - 禁食四十天,审美观,美好回忆,40-day fast

Day 19 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

 


第十九天:10月21日(五)

今天又发现上帝真的是很恩待我,“又”,因为一路来都感觉他超恩待这不配的我。。。
今天我看到以前我无法想象的事情,或者说我以前不知几时才会看到今天看见的那种情况。
我心深感安慰和鼓励。

事情是这样的,不知不觉韩国朴传道的服事开始了,因为我都在忙其它事情,此次服事事务都交予同工处理;我突然惊觉,糟了!服事就要开始,我还没跟同工确定服事的各样安排!
以前从排名到场面摆设、服事人员各岗位、交待及教导服事的范围和责任等等,一律都要我亲自出马。。。
朴传道的服事性质特别,再加上文化不一样,我以前都不容有失,所以要监督每一部份!

当我突然觉悟我都还没监督一切和确定安排是否妥当时,我急忙往要使用的小礼堂观望,心里马上无比安慰;每份工作我的同工都已弄妥和分配的井井有条、清清楚楚!
我顿时想起早上读经时注意到的经文:

“西门彼得问耶稣说,主往哪里去? 耶稣回答说,我所去的地方,你现在不能跟我去。后来却要跟我去。”
~约翰福音13:36~

虽然耶稣讲的是关于彼得当时生命和信心未能达到为主殉道,后来却能为主殉道,但我也领悟到,以前很多事情都要交待同工,他们才懂怎么做,或做的合乎要求。。。
然而今天,在我丝毫没有交待和监督之下,他们已把工作安排的十分妥当!真的是以前所做不到的,如今却能做得那么好!我心充满感恩。。。

我们每个人都充满潜能,只要我们继续在主里和依靠他,我们绝对能不断进步和出众!

 

Day 19 : Oct 21st (Fri)

Today I once again realized God is very gracious to me, “once again”, because all along I have been feeling He is very gracious such an undeserving me…
Today I saw something I could not imagine before, or should I say I did not know back then when I would be able to see what I saw today.
My heart was greatly comforted and encouraged.

The story goes, without realizing Pastor Park’s ministry began. Because I was busy with many other things, the detailed duties this time I handed to my staffs to handle. I suddenly realized with a shock, oh dear! The ministry is going to start in a while, I haven’t even acertain with my staffs all the arrangement of the workload this time!
Before, I had to take care of and supervise everything like arranging of names of people to be prayed for, duties of every helper, teaching and briefing them on their work boundaries and responsibilities etc…
As Pastor Park’s ministry is unique, coupled with the issue of cultural differences, I would not risk any error, so I must supervise every area!

When I suddenly realized I had not even double-check everything to make sure everything is in order, I quickly took a peep at the small hall we are to use for the ministry, immediately my heart was indescribably comforted, my staffs had already prepared and divided all the workload to my utter satisfaction!
I was immediately reminded of the verse I noticed while reading the Bible this morning:

“Simon Peter asked him, “Lord, where are you going?”
Jesus replied, “Where I am going, you cannot follow now, but you will follow later.””
~ John 13:36 ~

Even though Jesus was referring to Peter’s faith and spiritual life not up to the level of being martyred for Him at that time but later did actually die for Christ, I also recalled, in the past I had to brief my staffs on many things, and only then they knew what to do, or how to do things satisfactorily… However, today without any of my instruction and supervision, they have already prepared everything properly and nicely! Really, something they were unable to do before, but today they did it so superbly! My heart is full of gratitude…

All of us are really full of potential, as long as we remain in and rely on the Lord, we can really improve and excel!


Day 18 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

第十八天:10月20日(四)

今天,神再次提醒我何谓“新事”:

“看哪!我要做一件新事,如今要发现,你们岂不知道吗?我必在旷野开道路,在沙漠开江河。”
~以赛亚书43:19~

这些年来,我们常在祷告会或聚会时信心满满宣告神会赐福我们超过所求所想,然后情绪高昂喊“阿们!”,很开心满足的回家去。
可是,日复一日、年复一年,一切如常。。。
结果很多人困惑埋心中,有一些依然所谓的“单纯”或“盲目”相信,有一些就干脆信心软弱,不再相信。。。

可是,我每次有感动带领人这样子宣告和祷告时,我的确是很确定会发生,而且知道那感动是来自神,不是搞气氛或煽动情绪!所以,我也很期待看到那些应许成就在大家身上,尤其是那些很需要在生活和经济上突破的人。。。

有时候,我也会问神,你所讲的超过所求所想的事到底是什么啊?几时会来到?

所以,神今天就提醒我几年前听过一位牧师讲的道,他讲了一句话让我印象深刻,我也在教会分享过,即:
“一直反复做同样一件事情,却期待看到不同的效果,是疯狂的!”

很多人期待经济大突破,可是还是一贯做同样的工作、职位或者什么的,当然那不会有改变啊!那也不是什么“新事”!
当然我们也不能说,因此每个人应当换工作或事业,或换个生意做等等,因为只有少数的人能这样做,而且也不完全实际!
那该怎么办呢?

这就是神的启示:
我相信心态得神喜悦的,时候一到,神若不是带领他们到新的领域或机会,就是留在原位有其它不会骚扰到他们份内工作的,从外面来的祝福来到。
就以我自己为例,突然在某处可能我的专辑莫名其妙被注意,而开始触摸到更多人,出版数量增加;或教会收到自己教会以外意想不到的奉献等等。。。

所以,我们灵里一定要敏锐,要会洞察神的机会来到。。。

 

Day 18 : Oct 20th (Thur)

Today, God reminded me again what a “new thing” means:

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”
~ Isaiah 43:19~

All these years, we often declared with much faith, in the prayer meetings or other meetings that God would bless us beyond what we asked for or imagined, then with highly charged emotion shouted “Amen!”, and went home with much gladness and satisfaction.
But then, day after day, year after year, everything remains the same…
As a result, many people keep their perplexity in their hearts, some continue to believe “innocently” or “blindly”, what is worse, some are stumbled and become weak in their faith and no longer believe…

But, each time when I felt led to lead people with such declaration and prayer, I was very certain it would happen, and knew that prompting was from God, I was not trying to stir up the atmosphere or people’s emotions! So, I was also very expectant to see those promises accomplished on everyone, especially those who desperately needed a breakthrough in their living or finances…

Sometimes I would ask God, what are the things that You referred to that are “beyond what we can asked for or imagined”? When will they arrive?

Therefore, today God reminded me on something I heard from a pastor a few years’ back, he said something that left a deep impression in my heart, I had shared this in church before as well, that is:
“It is insanity to keep repeating the same thing and expecting a different result!”

Many people expect a breakthrough in their finances but they are still doing exactly the same job, in the same position etc, then of course nothing will change!And that is also NOT a “new thing”!
But of course we cannot say everyone must therefore change to a new job or career, start a new business etc because only the minority are able to do that, and it is not entirely practical to do so too!
Then how?

This is God’s revelation:
I believe people with God-pleasing attitudes, when the time comes, either God will lead them into a new territory or opportunity, or they will remain at the same place and without affecting their responsibility and commitment to their job, extra blessings come to them from outside!
To use myself as an example, perhaps suddenly somewhere my albums are being noticed and begin to touch more lives, so publication increases; or our church receives donations and offerings suddenly from outside unexpected sources etc…

Therefore, we must be sensitive in our spirit to discern the coming of God’s opportunities…

Day 17 : 禁食日记 / Fasting Diary

 

第十七天1019(三)

在这段禁食时间,其实都有安排不同的同工或领袖带领每天的祷告会;可是从第一天开始,几乎每一次我都有感动自己带领。。。
感谢主,每一次带得很轻松、很享受,上帝也不断引领启示;神一定给我们知道当天要祷告的事项,和当天要我们学习的真理和属灵功课。事实是,每一天上帝所启示的不止我“禁食日记”里写的那么少或短,只是时间有限,所以我只将部份或重点记载在这里与大家分享。

今天中午神也说了很多话,但我要分享的是晚上的:

“愿我的祷告如香陈列在你面前;愿我举手祈求,如献晚祭。
耶和华啊,求你禁止我的口,把守我的嘴。
求你不叫我的心偏向邪恶,以致我和作孽的人同行恶事;也不叫我吃他们的美食。”
~ 诗篇141:2-4~
第一节的第一个字“愿”告诉我们事实未必是如此,它是一个心愿,既是说,我们的祷告搞不好在神面前不是香,而是臭气!
若内心不干净,存有妒忌、怨恨、苦毒、批判、论断等等恶劣态度,那发出去的肯定是臭气;若嘴巴不圣洁,又赞美神,又咒诅、论断、讲人是非或污秽话语等,那发出去的也将是臭气。。。若生命虚假、假属灵、只做给人看,要讨人喜欢等等,发出去的也是臭气。。。
因此神说,不要以为表面上很会赞美敬拜和祷告,禁食、服事等等都很摆上。。。献上的祷告未必是香气!若是臭气,神根本就不会靠近。。。

Day 17 : Oct 19th (Wed)

During this fasting period, I actually did schedule different leaders to lead the daily prayer meeting; but since the first day, I felt led to lead almost every time…
Thank God each time I could lead with much ease, I really enjoyed it, and God kept on leading and giving revelations. God would certainly reveal to us the prayer points that day and the spiritual truth and lessons He wanted us to learn that day. In fact, what God revealed each day is not that short or little as you have read in my “Fasting Diary”, but because time is limited, I can only record parts or the main points here to share with you.
This afternoon God said a lot of things too, but I want to share the revelation from the night prayer:
“May my prayer be set before you like incense; may the lifting up of my hands be like the evening sacrifice.
Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.
Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil, to take part in wicked deeds with men who are evildoers; let me not eat of their delicacies.”
~ Psalm 141: 2-4 ~
The first word of the first verse “May” tells us that the fact may not be so, it is a wish or desire, meaning our prayer may not be like incense or sweet-smelling before God, but a foul smell instead!
If our heart is unclean, harbouring all sorts of bad attitudes like jealousy, hatred, bitterness, judgments on others etc, then it will give out foul smell; if our mouth is not holy, we praise God and curse others, judge, gossip and speak filthy words, then foul smell will come out too… If your life is fake with false spirituality, only acting to show people or to please people etc, then it will smell bad too…

Therefore, God said: Do not think that just because outwardly you seem very good at praising, worshipping and praying, very sacrificial in fasting and serving… the prayer you offer up may not be incense! And if it is a foul smell, God will not even come close…