February 16, 2012

我想一个美丽又成功的生命就是在活着的时候带给人欢乐和鼓励，离开时依然让人心得安慰和欢乐。。。
颜妈妈让我有这个感想，她。。。昨天离开这世界回天家去了。。。

I think a beautiful and successful life is one that gives people joy and encouragement while alive, and similarly continues to bring people comfort and joy when leaving the world…
Aunty Gan gave me this thought, she… left this world to go to heaven yesterday…

 

颜妈妈几个月前被发现癌症末期，她从不惊惶或抱怨，对上帝依然充满感恩，还常鼓励弟兄姐妹要爱主、信靠主。。。辛苦或疼痛时，她就祷告主，疼痛就会消失。若有力气起来或撑得住，她一定跟先生颜爸爸来教会敬拜主，也参加乐龄小组聚会。很鼓励的，去年11月28日的教会家庭欢乐日，他们与大家一样凌晨六点都已到达运动场等候。。。

Few months ago Aunty Gan was found to have contracted final stage cancer but she was never panicky or complaining, she continued to be thankful to God, and always encouraged brothers and sisters to love and trust in God… When she was feeling some discomfort or pain, she would pray and the pain would disappear. If she had the strength to get up or sustain, she would come to church to worship with Uncle Gan, and would join the house group for the elderly too. Something very encouraging, on November 28th last year, they arrived at the sports stadium to wait as early as 6am together with everyone else…

 

其实昨天我本计划好要去探望颜妈妈，可是又开会又赶工什么的，拖延到没时间过去。。。哪知在傍晚时分，就收到她去世的消息！我心痛如刀割，当然也非常自责。。。心里一直怪自己为什么不够敏锐，为什么不能多摆上时间一点。。。开车去她家的时候，心里很是难过。

一抵达她家的时候，她女儿的一番话就已鼓励了我。我告诉她我很内疚今天没来探望，她说不要难过，妈妈一直都告诉她说她知道牧师很爱她。。。多体贴的一位老人家！我那么少探望她，她却没抱怨，说了解我忙，也一直告诉她女儿说她知道牧师很疼爱她。

当我瞻仰她遗容时，她是那么的安详美丽，我知道她是快乐的，我知道她已经到了天堂，我心得了很大安慰。。。
颜妈妈，活着的时候鼓励我，离开时依然鼓励我。。。

上帝啊，谢谢祢在我事奉道路上给我这么好的长辈祝福我。

Actually I planned to visit Aunty Gan yesterday, but I was caught up by meeting and work, and was delayed till I did not have time to go over… Then at evening time I received news that she had passed away! I felt my heart pierced like a knife and of course felt very remorseful… I kept blaming myself inside as to why I was not sensitive enough, why could I not offer up more of my time…. I was feeling very sad as I was driving to her house.

Upon reaching her house, her daughter’s words encouraged me immediately. I told her I regretted not coming to visit today, she asked me not to feel bad as her mother had been telling her that she knew the pastor loves her a lot… Such an considerate elder! I very seldom visited her and yet she did not complain and she said she understood I was busy, and kept telling her daughter she knew that the pastor loves her dearly…

When I looked at her face, she was so at peace and beautiful, I know she is happy, I know she is now in heaven, my heart is greatly comforted…
Aunty Gan, encouraged me when she was alive and encouraged me still when she left…

O God, thank You for giving me such a kind elder to bless me in this journey of serving You.

感谢主让我在上个月大年初一有机会拜访颜妈妈，与和她一起合照。。。
下面的是颜爸爸，他也是一个极其谦卑、忠心和非常鼓励我的长辈。。。

Thank God for giving me the opportunity to visit Aunty Gan and had a photograph taken with her on the first day of Chinese New Year last month…
Below is Uncle Gan, who is also a very humble, faithful and encouraging elder to me…

February 6, 2012

 

有时候，所仰望的、所相信的、所期盼的，看不到也感觉不到。。。
有时候，心情会低落、会难过。。。
有时候会问主为什么，或在什么时候。。。

Sometimes we do not see or feel the things we hope for, or believe, or expect…
Sometimes we would feel down and upset…
Sometimes we would ask God why, or when…

 

那天，我感到失落。。。其实，何止是那天。。。
去年底禁食时候的一些兴奋、期待，仿佛消失的无踪影。。。
多希望他跟我说一两句话，给我一点鼓励。。。

That day I felt down… in fact, not only that day…
Some of the excitements, expectations during the 40-day fast end of last year seem to have disappeared…
How I hoped He would say speak a word or two to me, to encourage me…

 

这种时刻，我常在心里默默祷告，偶尔也会个人呐喊。。。
然后就会想读读圣经，有时候真的提不起劲。
坐在桌子旁，看着我的圣经。。。
随手翻开我极少注意的撒迦利亚书，很莫名的开始读第九章。。。

In moment like this, I often pray silently in my heart, occasionally I would scream alone too..
Then I would think of reading the Bible, but sometimes really feel not very motivated.
I sat by the table looking at my Bible…
I flipped through the pages randomly and landed my eyes on the book of Zechariah that I seldom pay much attention to, and began to read Chapter 9 haphazardly…

 

读到第九节时，有一些感动回来了。。。感觉上帝再提醒我，鼓励我！
因为经文就是我去年底40天禁食第一天，上帝给我的诗歌“欢迎祢来”的核心经文！
当时写这首歌时，主要是看新约里提到的同一经文，根本没去查看旧约经文出处。。。今天正当我感觉失落时，竟然让我“莫名”再看到经文，印证上帝所说的，他真的要来。。。

When I arrived at verse 9, some prompting returned to my heart… I felt God was reminding and encouraging me again!
Because the verse is the central verse of the song “I Welcome You In” God gave me on the first day of our 40-day fast end of last year!
When I was writing this song then, I was looking at the same verse mentioned in the New Testament, I did not go and search as to where it came from in the Old Testament… and today just when I was feeling down, I “inexplicably” stumbled upon this verse again, confirming what God told me, that indeed He is coming to us…

 

“锡 安 的 民 哪 ， 应 当 大 大 喜 乐 。 耶 路 撒 冷 的 民 哪 ， 应 当 欢 呼 。 看 哪 ， 你 的 王 来 到 你 这 里 。 他 是 公 义 的 ， 并 且 施 行 拯 救 ， 谦 谦 和 和 地 骑 着 驴 ， 就 是 骑 着 驴 的 驹 子 。”
～撒迦利亚9:9～

神啊，谢谢祢！
我还在相信。。。我还在等。。。

“Rejoice greatly, Daughter Zion! Shout, Daughter Jerusalem! See, your king comes to you, righteous and victorious,
lowly and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey.”
~ Zechariah 9:9 ~

O Lord, thank You!
I am still believing… and I am still waiting…

 

 

February 3, 2012

 

我有很多喜欢，但是我的时间不够。。。

我很喜欢创作诗歌、写作，可是太多时候时间不够；而且有时间时不一定有灵感，有灵感时不一定有时间，。。。
再加上有时候太累提不起劲，或者身体或喉咙状况不是很理想。。。

I have many likings, but I do not have that much time for all…

I really like to write, whether songs or articles, but too many times I do not have the time; even when I have the time, I may not have the inspiration, or when I have the inspiration, I may not have the time…
On top of that, I may be too tired to feel like doing anything at times, or my physical or vocal condition may not be ideal…

 

我很喜欢一个人在家，轻轻松松和咖啡，弹弹吉他、唱唱歌，但多少时候有那么多时间这样好好享受。。。

I really like to be at home alone, to just relax, have a cup of coffee, play the guitar, sing some songs, but how many times do we have so much time to really enjoy so…

 

其实在大学或求学时代还比较能这样享受，如今一个星期有那么一次已经是很奢侈的享受。所以，还在求学的你们啊，要好好珍惜，好好享受。。。

Actually it is more likely you can have all this enjoyment while you are still at school or university, but now it is already a luxury if I can have that once a week.
So for those still at school, treasure your time and enjoy while you can…

 

我很喜欢跟好朋友吃饭、喝茶、聊天、旅游，可是太多时候时间不够用，在现今忙碌的世界要配合每个人的时间，真的难之又难。。。

I really like to spend time with friends, eating, having a cup of tea, chatting, travelling, but too many times I do not have the time, and in today’s busy world, it is really difficult to find a time that suits all…

 

我很喜欢做很多事情，我有很多兴趣，但偏偏人的能力和时间都有限，环境和现实生活也未必允许。。。
所以只好面对事实，要从中选择，要分配时间，有时候要放弃一些。。。

I really like to do so many things, I have so many interests, but human’s ability and time are limited, environment and reality may not permit it too…
So I just have to face reality to pick and choose, to allocate my time, and sometimes to give up some…

 

愿我的选择常是对的，愿我的决定没有后悔，愿我今生没有遗憾。。。
I just hope that my choice is always right, that there is no regret in my decision, and I do not live a life that is wasted…

 

最重要的是。。。
愿我在最忙碌、最需要选择的时候，始终先选择跟你在一起的那个时候。。。

The most important thing is…
I hope even in my busiest moment or time that I really must make a choice, let me be always choosing that time to be with YOU…